I mentioned to my mother a few weeks ago that I was working on a book about growing up in the family that were so top of their show biz status when I came along that my birth was announced in Variety and The Hollywood Reporter back in the day. Like a good mom she cheered me on, but said that she could not be of much help as for her the past is the past and memories fade.
And that is a-okay with me!
Then I received a surprise.
My mother dug into some old files and found notes that she thought that she had discarded. Some from a published project of hers, and many others from a non published one. She spent some time scribbling notes upon and around the already written recollections and sent them packaged on its way to me.
In our weekly phone call my mom and I had one of those chats that a mother and son do not normally engage in; one where we were both open with not only our hopes and fears about the project at hand, but at what I saw and witnessed as the "quiet one" in the family. In fact, I provided mom with the key about why I think, upon the end of Bewitched and the divorce of "Uncle" Bill Asher (director and producer of the show) and "Auntie" Liz Montgomery (the star), Liz stopped speaking to we Ackermans altogether, and no longer let their children associate with us (I did not see them again until we celebrated Bill Asher's 70th birthday sometime in the early 1990's, I recall).
I think I put the puzzle piece in place for her as it was always a mystery. Interestingly enough my sharing of that with her, along with what I witnessed happen on the set of that show between Liz and a man, which seemed strange at the time to a boy, who I later learned was her lover, opened the valve to some memories of my mom's that were long since buried.
Who knew that there was so much left for me to mine!
In a generosity which is characteristic of my mother she invited me to, as I write and as I peruse what she sent to me, to merely write down any questions that come up, and she will write to me all that she can recall. What a gift. This, like any modern day package came with a warning. As she told me from her previous writing experience (In the Kitchen with Elinor Donahue http://www.amazon.com/Kitchen-Elinor-Donahue-Favorite-Hollywood/dp/188895292X/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1457375682&sr=8-1&keywords=in+the+kitchen+with+elinor+donahue ) "Once you open up Pandora's Box, you cannot close the lid."
Thankfully, I believe this opportunity has come to fruition at a good time in my life, where I have experienced much growth and maturity. I think beyond what I witnessed, known and unknown to my mother, during my growing up in Hollywood, God knows that I am ready to confront anything that comes forth. I am grateful for that.
I will continue with this blog, of course, as it helps me to remain in touch with writing, but soon I will post less so that I can write the book, and not just write about writing the book. As my friend Herbie J. Pilato told me on more than one occasion, "You have a story to tell. Tell it!"
So, again, here goes nothing!
1 comment:
Soul searching and identifying one's true life story is awesome to witness...whether you are of Hollywood or Appalachia. Looking forward to your memories...reading is almost as good as personal experience when it comes from the heart & from real life.
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